World Happiness Report

Have you heard of the World Happiness Report? This report ranks over 150 countries in terms of people’s self-reported perception of their happiness. I read a blurb about the report. Fascinated, I then clicked on the link to read the actual report. Yea, I’m a bit of a geek. I figure I should put my data and analysis day job skills to use on something that actually interests me.

What I found interesting in the report was that Americans’ happiness has significantly decreased since 2012. What happened in 2012? This was the first year that most of Americans owned a smartphone. This especially caught my attention because 2012 is the year that I first had a smartphone!

There are many theories on what’s behind the correlation. It’s not so much the 24/7 access that the smartphone has to, well, pretty much everything you can dream up that causes the unhappiness. Most researchers say it’s what the smartphone is taking the place of, primarily in-person social connectedness.

That makes sense since social connectedness is a major factor in determining happiness. Just as I wrote in the post, Joy in Connecting with People, joy from connecting to others goes all the way back to our cave person days when we literally needed others for survival. Happiness from uniting with others is in our DNA!

In present day, as well, researchers have found that we greatly benefit from connections to others—we are physically healthier, less aggressive, more helpful, and we recover from stress easier. Just generally, we are happier when we interact with other people.

I’m not writing a scientific research paper here so I can just blurt out my opinion from my own personal information. For me, my smartphone has increased my happiness because nearly everyday I find myself being grateful that I have it so I can connect with my friends and family so easily—most of which don’t live nearby. I also use my smartphone to stay connected to my husband throughout the day. Some days we don’t actually text or email each other. But just knowing that we can, increases my feeling of connection to him.

So use your smartphone in smart ways. Don’t let it disconnect you from people, but rather use it to increase your bond to others. Talk, text, or email people significant in your life. You can even use it to simply set up when and where you are going to physically meet up with your friends or family. Remembering to be grateful that you have the device to easily keep in touch across distances near and far will ensure that you don’t fall into the statistic of the decreasing rate of American happiness.

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Trail to My True Self…Published!

I did it! Trail to My True Self: My Journey to Self-Love and Happiness is now available on Amazon.

WordPress has a neat feature that allows blog creators to see what countries have viewed their posts. In doing research for my book, I saw that about 87 countries have viewed my blog. Wow! Obviously, I was glad and amazed. But it also showed me that I was connecting to people. And that people all over the world are interested in finding ways to be more joyful.

So, if you feel so inclined, I invite you to take a look at my book, Trail to My True Self. My hope is that it inspires you to bring more joy into your life.

Click here to get the book on Amazon. Thanks. Happy reading!

 

 

My Book: Trail to My True Self

It has been quite a while since I published a new blog post. It’s not because I have just been “sitting around”. Ha! For many months, I wasn’t quite sure how to follow the two previous posts about the traumatic period for my husband and me. So, I didn’t post anything.

But, I did write.

For several years, I had been working on a self-help type of book. Loving the process; then hating it. Picking up where I left off; and then abandoning it. A back and forth pattern that drove me crazy. But recently, things lined up to bring me the help, motivation, and inspiration I needed to get the book completed!

Since Don’s heart surgery, I’ve gotten a new perspective on life. It made me see past experiences in a new light and understand them on a different level.

So, I changed the genre of my book from self-help to memoir. That means my nitty-gritty personal stuff is in there! I recount the whole story of how a cute guy helped me to discover my self-worth issue while hiking in the Grand Canyon. The realization that my dad’s early death contributed to the denial of my true self. And how not valuing and loving myself played out in everyday life—fearing my first kiss as a teenager; being an imposter with my husband; and suffering at work, to name a few.

My hope is that this book leads you to strengthen the value and love you always deserved from your true self.

Check back soon for the upcoming release of Trail to My True Self: My Journey to Self-Love and Happiness!

 

Making Positive Lists

Let’s remind ourselves why deliberate positive thoughts are necessary. If our minds are left untended to, the ego creeps in and takes over with worry, fear and negativity. This is just human nature. So it is vital to our joy to consciously place good, positive thoughts in our awareness lest our egos will take charge.

Okay, so another way to use our thoughts to increase our joy is in finding positive aspects. We can find the positive in ourselves (which we’ve touched on in increasing our self-worth), in others, in circumstances, and even in challenging situations.

Positive Lists are similar to the appreciation exercise, but Positive Lists are aimed at a specific topic or person. For instance, we could make a list of positive traits of our spouse/partner, parent, friend, co-worker or ourselves. It could also be about our job, a vacation, or our home. It can even be about a (seemingly) “bad” situation or someone we don’t like.

The idea behind these lists is to shift our perception from negative to positive, to get us on the wavelength of a high vibration. Simply put, to make us feel good! Sometimes it is fun just to list a bunch of good things about someone or thing. Other times, it is greatly beneficial to deliberately adjust our bad feeling about someone or thing.

For instance, once when I was particularly feeling irritated by my husband’s actions (by the way, this is a normal part of close relationships!), I wrote a positive list about him. Not only did it make me feel better to focus on his good things, but I no longer felt irritated. Not only did I not feel irritated, but he no longer was doing those things in my presence! One time he began complaining about something that happened at work. Rather than try to ignore him (which I had tried in the past and found out does not work) I focused on my positive list about him. At the end of his rant, he ended by saying he was going to talk to another co-worker about it and not think about it anymore in that particular moment. Mind you, I had not even said a word to him. Within a month he proclaimed he wanted to be less cynical and more positive about things.

It is important to note that circumstances changed after I felt good. And that I did not set out to change anyone or thing, except for how I was feeling. I truly was focusing on and deeply feeling his positive attributes. It was not for pretend. The whole list was and is real. But, it did not matter if he saw his own good or not. It was all about how I was feeling about him. This is a good exercise in overcoming the ego rather than going down the usual ego path of pointing out how wrong or bad they are so we can feel better about ourselves. We are not trying to feel better by making another person wrong or inferior or by comparing ourselves to others. We truly are just acknowledging the positive in the other person, in a completely egoless way. We are deliberately making ourselves feel better and if circumstances happen to also change for the better, then that’s terrific as well.

Who or what are you going to make a Positive List about today? Try it! It will make you feel good!
Next time, we’ll focus on a Positive List about a “bad” situation.